Online Baby Scams on the Rise

Adoption.com is my favorite online “one stop adoption shop.” The site has everything, from informative articles for adoptive families, birth families, foster families and adoption professionals to photolistings of waiting children a link where prospective parents can post their profiles in hopes of getting matched with a birth mother.

I was dismayed to learn that an unethical woman – ok, let’s just call her a criminal – has been preying on would-be parents. Apparently, a women who went by the screenname noahsmom127, claimed to have access to birth mothers who wanted to place their babies for adoption. The woman promised to get couples in touch with the birth moms if they sent $200.

Hundreds of couples, from states such as California, New York, Utah, Texas, and Florida, sent $200 and never heard from the woman again. Although investigators know the identity of the woman, no arrests have been made and no charges have been filed yet. The woman has been scamming couples for over two years.

I’ve mentioned this in previous blogs, but it bears repeating: whenever potential adoptive parents and birth parents hook up, they should hire an adoption attorney and/or an adoption social worker in the birth mother’s hometown to assess the situation. Legitimate adoption professionals are usually aware of the current adoption scams and will alert you to red flags, such as birth parents who demand monetary support, who refuse medical care, who are transient or living in motels.

Think with your head, not your heart
People who want to adopt often think with their hearts instead of their heads. They yearn so badly for a child that they tend to overlook the warning signs of a possible scam. Although adoption is a transaction of the heart, it is also very much a transaction of the pocketbook, and people need to use wise business sense when investigating adoption, just as they would in any situation where they’re spending thousands of dollars.

On the whole, people who respond to the family profiles posted on websites are decent, honest people. But unfortunately, there are those who willingly prey on the emotions of desperate couples in exchange for a quick buck (or a quick couple hundred bucks).

I can’t stress enough the importance of asking resource people for references. Join adoption discussion groups (both online and in person) and pepper the participants with questions. When you’ve narrowed your choice of adoption professionals down to your top three, ask the agency or facilitator to send references from people who have recently adopted. Then contact those people and ask hard questions.

Keep in mind that one person may have a horrible experience with an adoption professional while another may have a perfectly delightful one. That’s because adoption professionals are so relational-based. Keep asking questions of clients and former clients until you are ready to choose a professional who you feel confident of and comfortable working with. After all, the future of your family rests in these people’s hands!

For more on adoption scams, see my entries for June 6, March 2 and 3.

Comments

[Geri Marshall]

ADOPTION FRAUD

I had a birthmother who was full-term, and we had been paired for several months, starting while she was in jail. I went to an adoption facilitator in California that I knew, Loretta. She said I didn't need her services since I was already matched.
I told her I was going with a certain lawyer, and she called me days later and said he had called her and didn't want to be involved because the baby's internal organs were growing outside of her abdomen, and referred me to an attorney she works with, John.
He called the birthmother, and told her she could get more from one of his Corporate clients, and a week before the baby was born she went with them.
I want to stop crimes like this, and know he can get disbarred.
If anyone has any advice, I would appreciate it.
The lawyer made a lot more money, the facilitator got paid $5,000.00 for sabotaging my adoption, and the birth mother got a lot of additional $$$ by switching couples, (over $25,000.00)

Thanks:

geriangel@excite.com